I See Zombies Everywhere

It is a good thing I live in the country, because when crazies come this way, it is in the form of “accidental” hunting attacks.

But this stuff is crazy! I have been reading the news today, and think maybe my original zombie post should have waited until today. I mean . . . damn.

This isn’t exactly zombie related, but insane all the same. This man in Northern New Jersey could certainly have spread the disease when he stabbed himself repeatedly and then threw bits of his skin and intestine at police officers! Yuck!

Then a man in Maryland admitted to hacking his housemate to pieces, then eating parts of his heart and brain! I mean I know this happened in ancient cultures, but normally the person was already dead right?

The mother of the man (Rudy Eugene) who ate the face of the man in Miami says her son wasn’t a zombie, he was a nice kid that did good things and he could have been subdued with a taser rather than gunfire. I do believe not even a few rounds stopped this kid from chowing down! How the hell is a taser going to stop him? Tasers don’t stop zombies! O.o

Rudy’s girlfriend continued by saying he would never have done that, it was his body but not his spirit. He was a god fearing man that knew his bible by heart. To me it sounds like a zombie attack!

This is all very disturbing to me.

Scott Talan is quoted here on CNN by saying “this is all nothing new,” bad things happen and people are attracted to bad news. I am sorry, but this is the first I have heard of a slew of people cannibalizing en mass.

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Zombies . . . the New Vampires

Lets face it, vampires suck now. Where they were once villainous monsters, they are now objects of romance, so lovable and misunderstood there is no possibility they could have ever fed on humans as if we were nothing more than cows at pasture.

But zombies, that is where it is at. They are taking the horror industry by storm, and with such creative workings it isn’t hard to see why. They (normally) can’t move fast, but they can take one hell of a beating.

I am sure I am not alone in saying they terrify me. I have watched Walking Dead, and every time I do, I have nightmares for a solid week. I don’t watch it any longer. The truth is, it wouldn’t be half as scary if a zombie-like infestation wasn’t possible. There are many things on this world that are able to inflict very similar zombie traits on their prey. Normally they are parasites of a kind, but they are able to control the creature and make it a husk of what it once was.

I won’t delve into it here, but if you are interested in all the ways this could happen, check out this article on cracked.com here. I know people will scoff that I am citing cracked.com, but having become a potential contributor to their site, I can tell you they research and validate all claims on their site to insure they are factual. So yes, it is possible.

This blog post is spawned by a recent news article I have read where a (I am assuming) crazy person was shot repeatedly for chowing down on some guys face. Sounds like a task for the yummy Winston brothers!

Now, the guy is being called a crazed cannibal, but is he? That is the question that rings in my mind after reading the man was shot once and continued chomping down! I am sure if the cop had shot him in the braaaaaiiiins he would have stopped the first time, because it doesn’t matter if you are human or zombie, that will stop you dead (no pun intended). And this wasn’t the first time!

But this is a serious matter. If a zombie apocalypse were to happen, I am sure it would be covered up until it couldn’t be contained any longer.

The CDC says they are big fans of zombies (and I am sure they are) but they say they know they are just fictional, which I am sure they are aware they are not!

Oh, just for fun (and we are told this is a joke) check out this crazy post by the CDC. Makes you wonder with all the crazed paranoid people out there (myself included) why on Earth the CDC would make a joking entry like this. . . .